Tuesday, 16 April 2013

False Economy, Dieting Tips and The Cats

Lunchtime today I popped out to grab some lunch as I forgot to pick up the ham from home this morning.

Around the corner from work is a Pound Stretcher and I can quite happily buy some lunch from there if I am not a snob about what I eat!

Sweet and Sour Supernoondles – 49p. Bottle of Pepsi – 55P, and a multipack of Skips 8 packs for 95p. The cunning plan: to have a pack a day for a week and a half.

By 4.30pm 4 bags had disappeared down this thrifty girl’s throat.

So it appears, I have a lesson to learn. Buy one pack and eat one pack. Buy 8 packs and devour the lot as soon and as furtively as possible.

Oh dear!

As so many celebrities get on the dieting band wagon with summer approaching, I am happy to share my tips on achieving a beach ready body.

·        Food consumed in secret, contains no calories
·        Food consumed in a different postcode / county to home also contains no calories
·        Food consumed around one’s birthday is “free” food
·        Chips, bread, desert “shared” from another’s also will not contribute to weight gain.
·        If one must attend a diet club, then ALWAYS ensure that the first weigh in is done in coat and shoes. Therefore you always have an emergency exit for meetings post emptying the biscuit barrel.
·        Adding a side salad to any food classes it as diet and will allow you to loose weight. E.g. Lasagne and salad, fried chicken and salad etc
·        Celery is not a snack, raw carrot is not a snack. A snack consists of carbs, oil and fat.

However, I have just discovered that we will be crossing over our holiday with another couple as we are staying in TC's parent's holiday home in Spain. A casual conversation yesterday evening went as follows.

ME “Are we crossing over with this couple at the beginning or end of our holiday?
TC “The beginning of ours, the end of theirs”
ME “Lovely, it will be nice to see them! Um so what does the girl look like?”
TC “Oh she is a pretty wee thing, and friendly”
ME ”Oh, good. When you say wee, what sort of size is she?”
TC “I don’t know… about an 8?”

Bugger! I am a solid 12 / 14.

Just to clarify, I am not concerned about the holiday cross over. I am concerned about the fact I will turn up with my slightly yellow British skin to be greeted by slender bronzed lovely. I may have to give up the kit kat chunkys guys…:o(

Had the pussy cats spayed yesterday and they came home feeling very sorry for themselves. Poor little mites.

Ever one to bring comfort and succour to our pets. I sat on the rug yesterday evening hand feeding them, rubbing upturned chins, scratching heads and stroking backs. Also whispering into an accusing ear that I had not taken them and if it was up to me they would never have gone. Everything was The Chap’s fault. Well, I don’t want them to hate me!!

Going forward we have to take them back in a week to check the scar, we also have to clean Belle’s teeth twice a day for a week as she has some gingivitus (sp?), and clean Twinkle’s ears once a day as she has ear mites again. This could be fun, as we all know how much Belle likes to be pinned down. *Sigh*, fingers are over rated anyway!

Frugally yours

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