Wednesday, 10 June 2015

So, Where Was I?


I would not blame you if you had long since given up reading this blog and moved on to other bloggers.

I haven't posted in over 6 months and my last post told you we were having some problems.

We spent the months before and after Christmas going through investigative procedures which resulted in February being told that The Chap has super sperm. Yes, seriously that's the term the Consultant used! Super Sperm! I bet you are imagining sperm wearing y front over tights now aren't up you as they frantically swim towards an egg?

His were plentiful, of a good quality and going in the right direction. Bless Him, he was so proud of his swimmers. He even told his parents over Sunday lunch recently. That wasn't awkward  at all love..

So why weren't we we pregnant with his determined little heroes ?

No matter how wonderful his sperm is at 42, if there are no eggs then there is nothing to fertilise.
The problem is all mine. I had hardly any eggs left.

So very very sad.

I had been using a fertility monitor which cost £100 new and I bought second hand from eBay. The sticks were then about £30 a month. Getting pregnant is not cheap.

I knew I wasn't ovulating all the time but thought that sometimes you could miss it, as you ovulated after taking the morning test but the it had gone by the next morning.

No, no egg, no happy fucking smiley face for me on the machine. (sorry for the swearing)

We are lucky we could have one round of NHS funded IVF where I live if we could give up smoking for three months. I smoked my last cigarette on 3rd of January before we had been told we couldn't conceive. The Chap a few weeks later after our consultant appointment.

TC sole contributions to the process is a twenty minute happy time in a locked room with some mags, me? Well mine involved needles blood work and a lap and dye. That's a process of injecting dye into your Fallopian tubes to check for blockages.  Don't let anyone tell you it will be a bit sore. Forcing one's cervix open is a painful but quick procedure the dye hurts like hell and then you wait with your FooFoo out for all in the X-ray department to examine.

IVF was booked for April as we had to start before my 39th birthday to qualify for free IVF. Honestly we were really lucky to get it hardly any NHS districts offer it so it was liked being offered hens teeth.

So the beginning of feb we learnt of my barren status and settled down to see if our IVF would be lucky. Would it?  What would happen?

I'm writing this now 20 weeks pregnant, and fat with knickers that roll down as I'm too tight to buy maternity knickers wearing eBay bought maternity clothes with terrible indigestion and Yet I couldn't be happier.

Two and a half weeks after being told the devastating news about our pregnancy prospects and I can't tell you how many tears later I was going to bed and couldnt find my pjs. Whilst searching for a clean pair I came across an old test and took it. I don't know why there was no smiley face again on my ovulation machine.

I thought I saw the faintest of faint lines. I didn't say anything to TC. What was the point? I cannot have kids. The next morning The Chap left at 6am for an early meeting and I was at the store by 20 past six in jogging bottoms and hoodie sans underwear. I bought one of every test. I mean damn the cost right? All were positive. Cue more tears and then a 14 hour wait before my handsome and loving Chap returned home to the good news.

No child will ever be more cherished and more loved than ours and I cannot wait to meet my baby on Halloween!!

Thank you for reading, it's been a journey hasn't it?

Frugally Yours